Removing Emotions From Your Negotiations

Buying or selling real estate is a very emotional and sometimes trying experience.  Afterall, we're dealing with your home or someone else's (depending upon if you are the buyer or seller).  Your home is the place where you spend so much of your time, and depending on your situation, that home will be or could have been a focal point in your life over the course of many years.

It's also inevitable that home ownership represents a significant financial commitment, so there's always some friction created when dealing with big ticket financial matters.

But if there was one piece of advice I'd want every buyer and seller to live by and follow through on, it would be to prepare yourself emotionally for your buying and/or selling experience.  Divorce yourself from your ties to your home if you are a seller.  Put yourself in the right frame of mind to sell by focusing on your future home and future needs and wants, not what you've put into the home you are leaving.  Think positively about your selling experience, and remember the opportunities you are affording yourself as you move on to your next home.

Negotiations can be tough on sellers in this market.  Getting a contract is hard work, and coming to a meeting of the minds on terms is even more difficult, as buyers feel they have the upper hand at the moment. You, as a seller, will probably feel a little beaten up if the buyer's agent is a skilled negotiator.  Again, you have to focus on the positives and put your home sale in it's proper perspective.

For buyers, the task of removing emotion is equally daunting.  You've searched high and low for the home you want plant some roots in.  You've looked at everything under the sun, either online or in person.  You've been frustrated that you couldn't find the right home, or the homes you've wanted were not within your financial means. 

Finally, you've found just the right home, and it's within your price range.  You're as happy as can be and excited about your potential purchase, which is wonderful!  But the fact remains that letting a seller or seller's agent see your excitement and eagerness to purchase could literally cost you thousands of dollars on your purchase price or weaken your negotiating position with regard to the seller addressing inspection issues or even agreeing to an appropriate tax proration on your contract.  As you view properties, keep your poker face on!  Let your agent speak for you if the seller's agent asks you questions or probes for feedback.  Discuss the pros and cons of a particular home in private with your agent - not in front of the seller or the seller's agent.